Many may not know this about me, but I’ve written on this blog a few years back about the time I failed Grade 3 because of reading and writing.  More about that time later.

By this point in my writing journey, I feel fairly confident of making the quarters/semi’s and sometimes finalist position of whatever contest, lab, or fellowship I enter.   But it’s still always nice to receive news that I made the latest quarter-finalist list as shown above in the Emerging Screenwriting Competition.   The semi-finalists will be posted later in May.  Stay tuned.

I’ve been in a bit of a funk these days.  Writing has not come easy.  More specifically, focus has been a struggle and distraction has been a thorn on my side.  Perhaps this is Covid hangover that I’m sure many of us are still feeling.  Motivation is lacking and I can’t seem to get back into the flow, even though I just completed my latest screenplay A Promise I Made to Mr. Bagels.  Rejections or lack of responses regarding my writing can be a depleting energy.

And yet I will say, that my play ANIMAL is being read by two Canadian companies – Persephone Theatre in Saskatoon and Prairie Theatre Exchange (PTE) in Winnipeg.   And after I sent a pitch of my screenplay LET IT SHINE to a producer, she was enthusiastic about reading the script.  Off I sent it.   And then you sit and wait and wait and hope that someone will get back to you sooner or later…usually it’s later, much later.  Sadly, in this business, because everyone is so darn busy, promoting other projects, the reality is most struggle to get back to you.  And so I keep sending queries out, I keep trying to write, I keep improving, I keep…

I’m left discouraged  at times wondering where this is all going. And yet, it has to remain about the act of writing, especially when one gets in that wonderful flow of ideas and inspiration.   Nothing beats that.   The world of possibility becomes magical.

I’m reading a book called:  The Practice of Groundedness:  A transformative path to success that feeds – not crushes – your soul.  The writer is Brad Stulberg and the book offers sound advice on how many of us are physically and mentally burnt out chasing after life and filling it with things that leave us empty and still longing for true fulfillment we crave.

Here’s a couple quotes I want to share from Brad:

Brad nails it down to these basic/common sense points :  acceptance (of who you are and where you want to go), being present in the moment (own your energy/attention) patience (will get you there faster), embrace vulnerability (it helps develop strength), build deep community (family/friends/work), move your body (exercise!).

Back to the time I failed Grade 3.  I remember that day like it happened yesterday.  I was told to stay behind (along with two other students from my class – Susan and Paul).  The teacher told us we would not be moving onto grade 4.  I cried with Susan and Paul in the hallways.  Back then, they used to fail kids.  They rarely do that anymore.  My mom and dad were brought into a meeting with the teacher and she told them that this would catch up to me if I didn’t repeat grade 3.  My parents, ultimately, were the ones who gave the teacher permission to fail me.

Best decision in my young life because it changed who I became.  I failed because of reading and writing…so I got focused/disciplined and started writing short stories during recess break…and began devouring books (I read every Agatha Christie book I could get a hold of).  I would not let this moment define me.  I worked to become a better student.  And my imagination (or maybe it was ADHD, who knows) literally took over.   From then on, all I wanted to do and be was a writer – a creator.

I can relate to what director Steven Spielberg once said:

All this to say, it’s okay to fail, or be in a funk.  You’ll pick up the pieces, but you’ve got to do the work.  Be patient and present.   Cry/embrace that vulnerability.  We are all vulnerable.   We are all on a twisty, wicked journey of life.  Try not to compare yours with others.  It’s a fine line between success and failure.  We all at points in our lives really don’t know what we are doing or where we are going.  That’s okay.   Breathe.   Ground yourself.  And for goodness sake, if nothing else, go for a walk!   It’s good for the soul and the heart.  Be kind to yourself.